Hi there, what am i should write here about myself?
My nick is Lenaaka Kika Tan. I'm currently 19 in year of 2013, happily taken by Kevin . He's the only one that understanding me, love the way of me, and a very best amazing boyfriend in the world.
I'm not fully finished studies, will entry into University on next year. I'm origin from Brisbane Australia, living in Malaysia now. That's all.

Life is never being perfect if you doesn't try your best change it by yourself :')

This is already midnight here, and i didn't get into my bed.
Because i can't sleep even my eyes feel heavy.

I was done editing my blog and i was wanted to register photo bucket and i put my boyfriend email to register it and i found out it said " the email is used already " I was like huh? What the hell is going on.

So i was on Google and search it with email. And in the moment, i found out the search have been shown up a blog that was registered by his email. Oh! this is was his old blog! i was shocked that why he doesn't tell me about it? Maybe he wouldn't talk about it. It's okay, i understand what does his feeling.

As his girlfriend, i'm not mad at all. Because everyone does have their past. So does this is a problem? My answer is No. The reason is because i do trust my boyfriend, and i do know he does move on his life after had been through a lot of mishap in his life of process but i'm so grateful that he's going up to be a mature boy and he doesn't hide anything from me, he's a really honest but sometime he does pulling on my leg with small matters. Ha ha~

Well, i admit it that i'm a fucking ass hole bitch that u will get annoyed! I'm such a loser, i am talking shit about myself because i never ever trust myself that i would do be a better just because i have low confidence about me. Fuck the shit. I do not study a lot but i always force myself to do it even i hate it. I always have a very hot temper that you wouldn't even stand on me! I'm not a good girl that you think. I'm bad, very bad.

I am trying my best to change my everything of myself to be the better and never will have the same problem of me anymore. And know what again! I found out that my boyfriend had been done a lot for his ex. I know that is past. Honestly he's so sweet toward to his ex before and he doesn't always do a lot for me and i do feel like i'm his maid because sometime i need to do this do that and follow him. I don't think that he is playing my feelings. Just i feel like weird. It is really hard to explain.

Wow, that would be a very long blog ever i type it and it is my first time. Because i have a lot things in my mind right now even this is sleeping time for humans! I'm a night bat. Awesome. Rid it off girl!

Anyhow, i do wish that my boyfriend would do a lot of sweet things for me. Well, i'm stupid and selfish because i'm afraid  that i will get conned. I do trust. I'm really sorry that i'm born to be ugly and deaf, i can't be smart because i'm lazy, i always act to be strong but honestly my heart always is a weakness when i'm crying. I know i can't make you happy. I'm really sorry that i do not know how to cook, i do not know how to talk properly. Sometimes we are hard to communicate because i do not understand what the hell you were talking. I'm so sorry.

I am trying to be the girl that you wish for. But there a thing i wanted to tell you that A GIRL WOULD CHANGE HERSELF FOR A BOY , AND THE BOY LOVE HER EVERYTHING BECAUSE IT'S TRUE THAT SHE'S BEING HERSELF AND NOT TO BE THE FAKE.